perspective taking and giving

Some people will probably choose to see this quick little painting…
(acrylic and #2 on cardstock, 8.5×11)

…as some evidence of a violent mind. I just used the colors that I still had on my palette., before they dried and were wasted.

I would’ve painted it blue and green like a calm sea. However, the colors I had to work with were: red, yellow, black and the closest to green I could get was Charleston. If this – or any of my work, really – is held up as evidence of illness…well, you may want to seek appropriate medical attention for yourself. I am not a violent person. Not at all. If you find violence here, you may want to consider whether or not it is really fair to hold a person accountable for other people’s errors in thought or consideration. Why is it that I am doing all the work? Bearing the weight of heavy consequence? I need to stop writing. I am becoming frustrated. I can appear quite hostile when left to fend for myself in a room built of brick. Yup, there’s more “psychotic” for you. I am so sick of this rubbish, this “treatment” –

If “we” are in crisis, perhaps you should consider your part in it, shoulder your weight. If not, at least leave me be. Unless of course you want to be my gallery rep or agent…whatever. Yup. There’s some delusion for you. I need to stop writing for a bit…though I am sure I will be back later. I am not sure I can have friends.

Everyone seems to think I am someone else’s burden to bear.

“Surely, she must be getting some help?”

No. Actually. I am not.

Yes, Outpatient Intensive is mightily relaxing, but mindfulness is no new trick to me. This blog is full of it. How can my “treatment” be successful, if I am the only person treated and the colony itself is sicksicksick…?

888

Some folks asked what it was I “see” in the clouds. I guess it depends. I am taking a fairly scientific approach to them at this point. The clouds are a good exercise in changing what you see by changing how you see things.

The song is Joshua Hawkins and I playing improv. He is in Greenville, I think. Someone should find him before he gets lost. He is a really amazing musician. More than he even knows.

I don’t believe in the sanctity of my confidentialities. I will, however, respect yours…know that my respect of your confidentiality does not mean that I respect you.

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