The Children ARE my focus…in the meantime, I am working on making sure that their Mom is amazing…

As specialists in lighting, I am sure you understand how vital our sense of light perception is on our ability to be fully aware of our environments. I am concerned that subducive lighting is having a negative aesthetic and sensory impact on our public spaces. I would be happy to discuss with you this matter in further detail and am able to offer you access to people/a person who have/has suffered grievous negative health effects due to manipulative use of light spectrometry in public spaces here in the US. Please do consider me with the utmost seriousness, as I believe that truly successful lighting design will soon hinge on whether or not the consumer is made to feel, quite frankly, ill when they go to the store, disoriented and overwhelmed, unable to focus…

People want to see clearly. Thank you. Sincerely, Faith Rhyne Asheville, NC

“What is she talking about? I see clearly.”

Good for you.
I don’t.
I find public lighting terribly disabling.

Speaking of, this blog will not be “KILLED” –

I am doing nothing wrong and ya’ll should be ashamed by your attempts to intimidate me…

I am doing nothing wrong…just trying to be the best Mom I can…and, yes, that means being a penpal with a Death Row Inmate…

(explaining my reasoning to a friend…)
“It’s just like any where that you can never leave, except a hundred times worse and lasts for years and then they kill you and the whole time you are there, you know you are there to die…and they rape you…so, yeah…”

(I would never talk to the children about Death Row. However, they will learn about it on their own and I would like them to know that I care/d enough to actually do something…we all need to care enough to offer what we can to help people who are voiceless…YOU WILL NOT MAKE ME VOICELESS, ESPECIALLY WHEN I WANT TO USE MY VOICE TO STAND UP FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN SO QUIETED FOR SO LONG…I am doing what you raised me to do, which is to stand up for myself, my rights, and the rights of others…including the right my children have to a mother who is as honest and committed in her word as she is in her love…I am doing the best I can to meet your expectations…



I have applied for quite a bit, forged contacts…gone to group, talked to my Doctor, a psychiatrist I actually trust…a smart man who seems to understand that “better” is relative term and that perhaps “sickness” may be a discouraging term to apply to me…



I am working on getting enriching and interesting roommates who are talented, safe and acceptable. Who will be points of enrichment, but more importantly, my friends…why are friends excluded from my list of expectations? Kill the blog, have no friends, get a place of your own…I have a place of my own…it is my house…it is where Shiny is buried and where the kids have awesome rooms they love…

You are not to speak to them about selling this house. You are not to speak to them about Mom going to live in an apartment. You are not to slander my ability to live a genuine and sustainable joyful and safe life in this home…it doesn’t have to make sense to you…only to those under this roof…the children included…they always thought it was weird that I didn’t have friends…almost like I couldn’t have friends…new roommate (possibly temporary due to his prerogative) makes crepes, plays soccer and reads Tolkien and surrealism. He is a little twitchy, but that is just because of his neurology. Is this pornography?

The grocery store security watched him like hawks; I watched them watch him…shopping. Why do all the interesting people get treated like possible criminals? We just wanted to buy milk, for crepes.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

I am shopping in places likely and unlikely for investors in this property. You’ll get your money back, you always do, and I’ll get a landlord that I feel okay paying rent to, as long as my right to make soup and play music with friends isn’t denied me. As long as I am permitted to pursue my creative interpretation of a personal realm that is…small and beautiful, but also a little confusing and hurtful.


In the meantime, I will survey your products and think about how elements of restorative light technology can be applied to the industry of illuminating public spaces. If you need a house to test lighting products, well – feel free to buy mine. It’s lovely. I will pay you rent. My parents/family is very…um, threatening? I have 90 days to find a buyer for my special home…it is almost a sanctuary. Please consider it an investment as I am confident that in five years, I will be able to purchase it back from you with the inclusion of a 50,000 deed holding fee. Sorry to try to sell you my house in this email about lighting. I am – as most perceptive folks are – a bit neurologically atypical in my communications. Well, that and the fact that I have 75 days to find someone to invest in the property at 273 South French Broad Avenue, Asheville, NC – to be my new landlords so that I am able to continue to live here. $275,000 USD is a bargain in this “re-developing” neighborhood. Okay. I’ll stop. But, if you know anyone who feels inclined to help so that I can help…tell them! www.mynameisfaith.net With Much Seriousness and Respect. Please, your consideration.

ANTICONVULSANTS


Faith –
I tried calling you yesterday – I hope you are okay. This is hard to say so I am just going to say it. I received a call from DSS yesterday informing me that there is an open CPS investigation in process on your family. I do not know any of the details as that is confidential to your family. But what I need to do right now is unappoint you from your case and put you on inactive status until this is cleared up. I hope you understand why I have to do that – for the integrity of the program. I continue to be quite concerned about you and hope you are reaching out for some help. Please keep in contact with me, I want to know how this all clears up if you want to share. excerpted
No problem. This is just one more way that
my family will need to recognize that their erroneous and unmindful approach to
me and my unique way of being has denied me something vital to me…helping
people who have voices unheard or diminished.

Fortunately, I have been for
quite sometime laying the foundation (via the Church of the Brethren) to be a
pen pal for an NC Death Row inmate and I received word today that someone who
is slated to d-i-e has been waiting a long time for a correspondent.

I feel
blessed to have seen the opportunity to learn so much about the perseverance of
the human spirit and the dignity that can be found in how we handle difficult
circumstances. In other words, I found a faith my own…pun intended and un
and look forward to dovetailing my future work as an advocate to the very
vital, very underfunded and under-recognized, structure of the system of care
as we know it…

Thank you so much for your sensitivity to my family’s
confidentiality. However, feel free to gain more insight (as well as kooky
cloud art social experimentation;) into just how much light can shine through
the holes in a rusted old barrel.

I am waiting for my visit with the kids
right now. I am more than okay and in the hand of true professionals, both
mental health and otherwise. It is amazing to me that I am still even
alive.

My Best to You and All,

Faith

Feel free to share this letter, it
meant a lot for me to write it and realize every single word is true.

I laid down a few tracks for the song of the day. I curled my hair, intending to go out and play music, but now I am tired. Here are some Pandora/youtubes…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6yg6LcquUI

http://www.pandora.com/music/song/shins/gone+for+good+alternate+version
http://www.pandora.com/music/song/cage+elephant/aint+no+rest+for+wicked
http://www.pandora.com/music/song/death+cab+for+cutie/expo+86
http://www.pandora.com/music/song/gary+jules/mad+world

whatever, dudes…

Any reference to dreams of dying (Mr. Jules) should not be attributed as suicidal ideation, I am thankful to still be alive in body…social suicide is another story…please, there are NO GROUNDS for commitment here. None. Not a single one.

With Respect and Consideration.

FR

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