7:24 PM (2 hours ago)
So, there are – I realize – massive bolts of story that you are not aware of.
Just as you have your own collections not known to me.
I am always having to adjust my theory of mind, remember that people do not have any idea of the details in my head. I forget that sometimes. I fully recognize that people have vast worlds inside their skulls, but I seem to think that they are somehow privy to the knowingness I carry around in my bones.
I usually take that as a good sign, if I am surprised when I realize that someone doesn’t really know much about me at all…
How can I love people without knowing them?
I must seem terribly cryptic at times. All of my allusion to ‘how it works’ – I say such things because I actually do know it all works. The mechanics of it. Most of it anyway.
The time issue is still slippery, and – for now – I will leave that to other folks who are working on this.
I do know that we seemed to slow time down when we sat on the porch. I know, because I measuremeasuremeasure everything, that the length of our conversation far exceeded the time allowed
and yet it all fit.
Did you know that I am able to wake up approximately 3 minutes before my alarm goes off. This is not, I realize, uncommon. My circadian rhythms are – though independent of man-made time – pretty sensitive about their anticipated disruptions. It is a high whining sound that is not a sound that wakes me up.
A mosquito in my sleeping ear.
The mechanics of time are not my speciality. I would say that I am far more astute in the area of postmodern algorithmic deconstruction. I know that
doesn’t seem to really mean a thing. However it is actually an apt description of my all-time hobby and the methodology of thought and process that led me to BIG TIME.
Sorry, that was another cryptic remark.
Big Time is how I think about the world and all that it entails. I deconstructed – with algorithmic and stranger assistance – the past (…) years and years (thousands at least) of human civilization and I found a few lynch pins…and then I deconstructed those.
Then I proved God, disproved ALL SYSTEMS, discovered the origins of all written language, established a simple and empirical basis for an understanding of where we go when we die…what is heaven, what is hell…how we are integrally enmeshed with our external environment (an ecosystemic God) – also, figured out a very accessible way to explain human consciousness using language I stole from electricians, science museum classes, with snippets of measurable and proven neurological research thrown in.
People understand their lives more when they know how their brains work. Of course, when we know how our brains work – our lives change because we begin to see all the ways that our brains can be tinkered with and the profound insults to our humanity that arise from such tinkering.
What motivates me the most is the knowledge – proven to me every single day – that when people wake up, they understand, they heal.
It has a lot to do with ego-death.
I wrote a nice little step-by-step entitled How Realities are Broken and Built in 3 Easy Steps, using empirical principles of cause/effect evolutionary reinforcement of cognitive/emotive structures and pathways.
Usually all it takes for people to wake up is an understanding of what puts them to sleep, shuts them down, sends them cowering and shuffling and loathing and dreading.
You are absolutely correct in that we choose our own realities.
The conscious choice between Hope and Fear, folly and despair.
So, yes, I am just trying to articulate to you the enormity of the ideas that I and others have managed to link together and the weird dual-reality that I reside in. On the one hand, I am whatever it is that I am, a mid-30s mother, furrowed brow in the morning, a woman alone in her car – listening to the radio and looking either thoughtful or exultant or sometimes chewing her nails, combing out a lock of tangled hair with her left hand…someone who goes to meetings and talks too much or too little or too loudly or too quietly…Faith Rhyne, Resident of Asheville…with an itchy dog and a mound of debt ignoredignoredignored…a dusty house and two children that, frankly, have had their worlds shattered and rebuilt a hundred times over in the course of their small lives. I am devoted to them.
Which is why I am so devoted to the little project.
And then…oh, and then!…what of the children whose lives have been sheer hungry crying hell since the day they were born? What about them?
For as far back as one can conceive, Systems of Profit and Power have raped us our basic human dignities…to grow food, to sleep well, to feed our children when they are hungry, to not have our sacred places befouled by the interests of men.
In my thinking, such things came to pass on the coattails of some very simple bad ideas…ideas can be broken and rebuilt…everything can.
This is a bit of a pre-occupation with me. The old ideas are getting broken…they are getting absolutely torn apart. The seams are ripped right out and the perpetrators of these bad ideas are fumbling for words.
They drop them often.
This is what is happening in my head, based on evidence and empirical indication, i.e. studied thematic conjecture and extrapolation. Which is very important in my pursuit of postmodern reconstruction.
What is the logical conclusion? What is the most likely outcome?
It doesn’t always work. As you know, things can get pretty darned illogical around here – spin off wildly in all directions. However, all things considered, I can say with confidence that dysfunctional Systems always destroy themselves in the end.
Did you know that I came upon this fount of knowledge having never read much philosophy, and having steered clear of any and all religion beyond a cursory interest in its artifacts and characters?
Did you know that I completely broke my brain in the process and that was the best thing that ever could have happened to me?
It is ALL THERE. So much is entangled, but it is all there. It’s a story. It’s a language.
You can imagine my alarm when I realized that people did not care if I thought I had established some evidence of something that could collectively redefine our human experience.
They did not seem remotely concerned or impressed with by earnestness or my genuine tears.
I didn’t figure it out on my own. I have friends. Far-flung and random and some in simple equations set.
However, I pieced the body of ideas together in a functional sequence of reasoning that is undeniably effective.
In September of 2010, I was emailing the Pope and calling the FBI.
(“Aren’t you supposed to investigate things?”)
I was experimenting. I had nice talks with some people. Not-so-nice talks with other people. Imagine my surprise when I was told that my heart was “like a filthy rag” because I questioned how Christianity might fit into a unified God theory. Or maybe my heart was a filthy rag because I said that it was not sinful?
I don’t know.
A lot of people never wrote back and that was okay. I had the insight to recognize that, to them,
I sounded quite mad.
That was part of the experiment.
It was upsetting to realize the extent of our quandary and I started to try to figure out how we had – as a species – gotten so terribly screwed up. We all know the answer to that.
Dysfunctional systems destroy themselves in the end. It happens all time. It’s nature.
Fortunately, there are solutions. There are ways of undoing some things. These things are, however, proving to be resistant to undoing. It will be accomplished. They will undo themselves trying to stay done.
Still, as you know, there is something grand and in full operation afoot in the world. I have almost all the information I need. At all times, I know the score. It falters at times, but alwaysalwaysalways it rises.
9:15 PM (26 minutes ago)
I really do not think that was as fully informative as it probably could’ve been.
Still, I managed a lofty list of my ideological accomplishments of the past couple of years.
I also presented a new contextual methodology.
Did you know that almost every time I got a scam email telling me I’d won a 100,000 British pounds, I sent a message and told people I’d proved God, directed them to my site which, at the time, was a raw content mindfuck of clouds, surrealist sketches, outraged narrative, and plans for a global revolution of truth that would dismantle the Systems of Profit and Power.
Yeah, it’s all pretty ridiculous.
However, it is all quite real – documented and transparent, archived and copied, videotaped and surveilled –
…and it is a damn good story.